I Name Jim My Soulmate
It was February 9, 1989, exactly one month since our meeting experience at Asilomar. We had spoken on the phone a few times. And we had written a dozen letters to each other. They were in-depth revelations of ourselves and how we’d affected each other. Now we were discussing ideas. As we shared at this profound level, Jim’s transformative influence upon me deepened. We were each reading, Irene deCastellejo’s book, Knowing Woman. She talked about woman’s need for the animus (the rational, clear-thinking, traditionally male function) to help her articulate what she knows in a diffuse way inside herself. This was the point in the book that spoke of my own journey. And, in his letter, Jim quoted to me exactly that passage from the book. I wrote back to him, “You couldn’t have quoted a more perfect portion of Knowing Woman. It perfectly describes my current position. I know what I know inside, but to put it in words is my challenge. deCastellejo wrote, ‘Through man, woman finds the animus who can express the soul she has never lost. Her burning need is to trust her own diffuse awareness, to know what she knows, and to learn to speak of it.’ Exactly my journey.” How did you find the most applicable statement to my journey out of that whole book? That’s incredible. You are my soulmate to do that. You shone your torch on my work when you said I had a work of genius.”
Jim was truly my soulmate. He was bringing concepts, support, and empowerment to me to blossom into a woman who could articulate what she has to give to the world. I had also read an article Jim had sent me that talked about “Presenting your soul to another.” I saw that we were doing that. We had a spiritual connection. And that was something I had longed for. But thought I couldn’t find a man who would be spiritual, yet non-dogmatic; not rigid. And we had read an article containing a Native-American love charm, “Your soul has come into the very center of my soul, never to turn away.” Our souls had found each other.